Fitting In

"Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer," with Burl Ives as the snowman, is a favorite animated Christmas program of mine. It first aired on television when I was six years old, so I have been watching it for a lot of Christmases. The theme of Rudolph is one that occurs often in children's stories; someone who just doesn't fit in but eventually triumphs. These stories resonate with kids because they understand how painful life can be for a child who is different. Of course, what holds Rudolph down is the very thing that ends up propelling him to new heights. If you have never seen this version of Rudolph, SPOILER AHEAD!

There is the Island of Misfit Toys. The squirt gun that squirts jelly instead of water; the train with square wheels. These are the rejected toys that have no children to love them. It's all very sad, but don't worry. Rudolph makes it all wonderful.

In romantic relationships, we polish ourselves all up and put our best foot forward. Now there's nothing wrong with that. On a first date, things like brushing your teeth and showering are really important. But do we want to impress so much that we hide what we think are our flaws? True intimacy will never happen until we let the other person see who we really are. We seem to keep our fingers crossed that he will love us IN SPITE of our flaws, when the truth is this. The right person will love us BECAUSE of those quirks.

I understand the dynamics of peer pressure. I understand why children and especially adolescents want to conform, but some of us are a little old to keep trying to be what we think other people want. Why not let those little quirks show? For some of us, they are impossible to hide anyway. Like Rudolph trying to hide his bright red nose, our attempts at covering them up are pretty awkward.

Why not give others the opportunity to love us for who we really are?

Susan

You have Loudmouth Birdie (www.loudmouthbirdie.com) to thank for this post. She suggested I write about the Island of Misfit Toys.