"Give light and people will find the way." Ella Baker
A dear family member commented that it is a blessing to let others walk their own path. For me, I have enough trouble keeping my own life in order that I don't have the time or inclination to stick my nose in other people's business. Now if a course is obviously set for disaster, the kind and loving thing to do is intervene, but for the most part a good philosophy is to live and let live. Offer love and support and give advice when it's asked for, but have the confidence that others will find their way in life. Their personal path is unique to them.
It's not a completely hands-off approach, however. This lady who believes in allowing others to find their own way is, herself, a source of light. When I think of her, I think of a bright light of goodness and hope. Those who are lucky enough to walk in her light will find their way, no doubt about it.
Susan
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
The Finishing Touch
"Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save them for a special occasion. Today is special." Regina Brett, age 90
Years ago I learned a way to save money on the weekly grocery bill. Build your menu around the supermarket specials that week. It takes some creativity, because you have to turn your thinking around. Instead of deciding you'll make spaghetti, then shop for the ingredients, you shop for the ingredients and then decide what dishes you can make. Back when I cooked for two hungry teenage boys, this kind of approach made a lot of sense. The Sunday paper had coupons every week, and one store discounted the coupon items even further so that it was possible to get a particular product for free. Of course, the hope is the "loss leaders" will bring you in, then you'll buy a bunch of other stuff that the store actually profits from.
In the aisle with the ketchup and mustard and olives and pickles, you can find these very expensive tiny jars of delicious capers. To me, they are an extravagance. But they are so good, adding that little something extra to sauces and dishes.
I have a new friend with a delightful way of enjoying life and turning everyday times into special celebrations. The last few times I had dinner with her, she has tossed some capers into whatever she was making. In fact, she made some pasta and after she had served it, she got up from the table announcing she had forgotten the capers. Oh my goodness. We can't forget the capers. So with her help, I have made a giant leap from those are an unnecessary extravagance, to where are the capers?!
As we go through life being sensible and practical, let's not forget those little touches that make all the difference. Those deliciously smelly candles, the soft, pretty sheets, the beautiful, feminine lingerie. And the capers. We can't forget those.
Susan
Years ago I learned a way to save money on the weekly grocery bill. Build your menu around the supermarket specials that week. It takes some creativity, because you have to turn your thinking around. Instead of deciding you'll make spaghetti, then shop for the ingredients, you shop for the ingredients and then decide what dishes you can make. Back when I cooked for two hungry teenage boys, this kind of approach made a lot of sense. The Sunday paper had coupons every week, and one store discounted the coupon items even further so that it was possible to get a particular product for free. Of course, the hope is the "loss leaders" will bring you in, then you'll buy a bunch of other stuff that the store actually profits from.
In the aisle with the ketchup and mustard and olives and pickles, you can find these very expensive tiny jars of delicious capers. To me, they are an extravagance. But they are so good, adding that little something extra to sauces and dishes.
I have a new friend with a delightful way of enjoying life and turning everyday times into special celebrations. The last few times I had dinner with her, she has tossed some capers into whatever she was making. In fact, she made some pasta and after she had served it, she got up from the table announcing she had forgotten the capers. Oh my goodness. We can't forget the capers. So with her help, I have made a giant leap from those are an unnecessary extravagance, to where are the capers?!
As we go through life being sensible and practical, let's not forget those little touches that make all the difference. Those deliciously smelly candles, the soft, pretty sheets, the beautiful, feminine lingerie. And the capers. We can't forget those.
Susan
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Sparks Fly
"It is good to rub and polish our brain against that of others." Michel de Montaigne
He told me how he and his sweetheart could argue and debate various issues, without either one of them becoming offended or angry. And often one did not persuade the other to change, either. They just sort of agreed to disagree in certain areas. What a unique relationship that is, and how exciting when two minds meet in that way. It sounded very sexy to me.
Long term relationships and marriages run smoother when there is agreement and accord in the major areas. It makes things easy when you share the same views on how to raise the children and how to handle money, for instance. And certainly it makes life more peaceful when you have similar tastes, likes and dislikes. But there needs to be a balance, I think, between having that other person be your soulmate (which sometimes means you just want a clone of yourself to make you feel more secure) and being a completely unique and different individual.
Susan
He told me how he and his sweetheart could argue and debate various issues, without either one of them becoming offended or angry. And often one did not persuade the other to change, either. They just sort of agreed to disagree in certain areas. What a unique relationship that is, and how exciting when two minds meet in that way. It sounded very sexy to me.
Long term relationships and marriages run smoother when there is agreement and accord in the major areas. It makes things easy when you share the same views on how to raise the children and how to handle money, for instance. And certainly it makes life more peaceful when you have similar tastes, likes and dislikes. But there needs to be a balance, I think, between having that other person be your soulmate (which sometimes means you just want a clone of yourself to make you feel more secure) and being a completely unique and different individual.
Susan
The Impossible Dream
"Hope deferred maketh the heart sick, but when the desire cometh it is a tree of life." Proverbs 13:12 (King James Version Bible)
For adults who are decorating and shopping, Christmas comes too fast. But for children, it is very slow in coming. Waiting to see if you will get what you have been hoping for can make it seem forever. But when Christmas morning finally arrives and that perfect gift is under the tree; is there a better feeling than that?
Hope is a wonderful thing and we all need it to survive and thrive. But there are some things we hope for that never come to fruition. It's a fine line to walk, this positive thinking and hoping for the best and never giving up on people, because it can make you sick.
Part of wisdom is knowing when to give up. Oh maybe you never completely give up, because I guess where there is life there is still some hope, but sometimes it is healthy to admit that it's highly unlikely. Then take the energy you've been using to hope and channel it into something more productive in your life. Take the focus off the impossible dream and as you look around with fresh eyes, you may see something else that's been there all along.
Susan
For adults who are decorating and shopping, Christmas comes too fast. But for children, it is very slow in coming. Waiting to see if you will get what you have been hoping for can make it seem forever. But when Christmas morning finally arrives and that perfect gift is under the tree; is there a better feeling than that?
Hope is a wonderful thing and we all need it to survive and thrive. But there are some things we hope for that never come to fruition. It's a fine line to walk, this positive thinking and hoping for the best and never giving up on people, because it can make you sick.
Part of wisdom is knowing when to give up. Oh maybe you never completely give up, because I guess where there is life there is still some hope, but sometimes it is healthy to admit that it's highly unlikely. Then take the energy you've been using to hope and channel it into something more productive in your life. Take the focus off the impossible dream and as you look around with fresh eyes, you may see something else that's been there all along.
Susan
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Bouquets of Beauty
"There are always flowers for those who want to see them." Henri Matisse
During challenging economic times such as these, many folks are cutting back. Small daily expenses can really add up, such as that morning trip to the coffee shop. It's smart to eliminate frills and concentrate on the essentials. But as we become more conscious of how we spend our money, we should be careful not to cut out all the little things that bring us joy. Fresh flowers on the kitchen table may seem like an extravagance to some, but if they feed your soul, how could you ever put a price tag on that?
It may be a struggle just to earn a living, but life needs to be more than the daily grind. We need to not merely make a living, but make a life and enjoy that life. There is beauty all around us, some of it totally free of charge, if we have but eyes to see it.
Susan
During challenging economic times such as these, many folks are cutting back. Small daily expenses can really add up, such as that morning trip to the coffee shop. It's smart to eliminate frills and concentrate on the essentials. But as we become more conscious of how we spend our money, we should be careful not to cut out all the little things that bring us joy. Fresh flowers on the kitchen table may seem like an extravagance to some, but if they feed your soul, how could you ever put a price tag on that?
It may be a struggle just to earn a living, but life needs to be more than the daily grind. We need to not merely make a living, but make a life and enjoy that life. There is beauty all around us, some of it totally free of charge, if we have but eyes to see it.
Susan
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
How Are You?
"There are two types of people; those who come into a room and say, "Well, here I am!" and those who come in and say, "Ah, there you are!" Frederick L. Collins
It's the season of holiday parties. Some are a lot of fun; others like the obligatory work-related party, maybe not so much. This time each year I think of a lady who died of cancer while just in her forties. She was attractive, talented and quite accomplished in her field. She could have made a grand entrance into a room and had all eyes on her. But it was never about her. It was always about you. The words "lovely" and "charming" were often used to describe her. Her loveliness was her genuine love for people, and her charm was the way she could draw out even the most reserved person. She was the perfect cocktail or dinner party guest, and every party dramatically improved when she was there.
At her funeral, many folks shared their memories of her. I said that when she asked, "How are you?" she truly wanted to know.
Susan
It's the season of holiday parties. Some are a lot of fun; others like the obligatory work-related party, maybe not so much. This time each year I think of a lady who died of cancer while just in her forties. She was attractive, talented and quite accomplished in her field. She could have made a grand entrance into a room and had all eyes on her. But it was never about her. It was always about you. The words "lovely" and "charming" were often used to describe her. Her loveliness was her genuine love for people, and her charm was the way she could draw out even the most reserved person. She was the perfect cocktail or dinner party guest, and every party dramatically improved when she was there.
At her funeral, many folks shared their memories of her. I said that when she asked, "How are you?" she truly wanted to know.
Susan
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