Don't Cry Out Loud

Her guests were sitting in the living room before lunch. She stepped outside to get food off the grill, tripped over the dog's water bowl, and fell, landing on both knees. While not seriously injured, it hurt like the dickens and she was about to burst into tears. But she didn't, because she was embarrassed to cry in front of her visitors. So she brushed herself off, happy to be wearing slacks instead of shorts, painted on a smile and walked back into the house to serve lunch.

As they were cleaning up later, her husband noticed the overturned bowl and wondered aloud about it. She told him the story. After checking her knees and giving her some aspirin and sympathy, he said, "That is what it feels like to be a man. You want to cry but you're too embarrassed."

My friend has cried in front of me a number of times over the years. I guess she has a comfort and trust level with me that makes it feel okay to her. It must be awful to never have that, to never be able to express your honest feelings or shed some tears. Her husband was raised in the 1950's and 60's when society definitely discouraged boys from crying. I'd like to think we're more evolved now, but I've seen it and overheard it recently. Little boys today are still being told to take it like a man. Be a big boy. Don't cry.

Male or female, we all hurt. We all experience pain. We should all be able to express that honestly and openly, with no shame and no embarrassment.

Susan