Later this year, my best friend will be getting married for the second time. I was a bridesmaid at her first wedding 35 years ago, and I will be the reader at her ceremony this time. Instead of a flower bouquet, she will have a crystal bouquet. Apparently, they are all the rage, in case you hadn't heard. She has asked her female friends and family members to each contribute a piece of inexpensive jewelry, white or silver or gold or clear. Then she will attach the jewelry to a wire stem and turn this all into a bouquet. She likes the idea because it's different, it's something she will keep unlike fresh flowers that die, and there is sentimental value attached to the jewelry.
I didn't think I had anything to contribute, because my jewelry is all pretty colorful. Then I was cleaning out Pink and found a pair of earrings I had forgotten I had. Fake white pearl with silver. Yay! I can now participate. One of the earrings is broken; that wire thing that goes in my ear is missing. But that is not a problem since she is going to be taking the jewelry apart in some cases anyway. So I lovingly wrapped the earrings up and put them in an envelope and popped it in the mail.
I kind of like that what I sent her was broken. We women seem to put a lot of emphasis on having the perfect wedding day, maybe a precursor to the perfect life to which we feel entitled. Certainly the first time around, my friend had expectations based on a combination of the fairy tales we like to believe and the lack of life experience she had at the age of 20.
It's different this time around. For her. For her future husband, who was also married once before. For me, because back when I was 19 I never would have thought that broken earrings would be a worthy contribution. Yet life and love and we humans ourselves are made of missing pieces and broken things.
At her first wedding, I was inexperienced with alcohol and had too much to drink at the reception. I don't remember, but I have been told I was very entertaining. It seems I'm a funny drunk. The last time my friend and I were together (she lives across the country from me) I reassured her I would not do that again. I would drink very little at this reception. She frowned and said in a sad voice, "Oh. How disappointing."
What can I say? I am not about to disappoint my best friend. So I will memorize and rehearse my readings, so I can deliver them without reading any notes. I will find a beautiful dress and shoes, and carefully do my hair, makeup and nails. I will do my friend proud. Then at the reception, I think I might have a little too much to drink. Not way too much like that first time, but maybe a little too much. The Second Coming of the Drunken Bridesmaid with the Broken Earring.
I doubt anyone remembers how well put together I was at her first wedding. How precisely I walked down the aisle at the church on the arm of a groomsman. But people still remember me as the drunken bridesmaid, and they smile. For a while I was mortified, then I was embarrassed, but now I'm good with it.
Missing pieces. Broken things. Second chances. Drunken bridesmaids. It's all good.
Susan
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Friday, July 15, 2011
Being Alive
"Life is without meaning. You bring the meaning to it. The meaning of life is whatever you ascribe it to be. Being alive is the meaning." Joseph Campbell
The sages down through the ages have pondered the meaning of life and what its purpose might be. Some people find meaning in religion. They spend time in prayer, they read the sacred writings, they ask their god what his will would be, and they try to carry it out. Others find meaning in philanthropy, or perhaps helping their fellow men through medicine, science, music or art. There are those who chase the American dream, whose success in the business world provides jobs for other people. There are those who wander through life wondering what to do next, why they are here on this earth at this place and time, and what it is they should do. They seek meaning and purpose. They cry out for truth.
I recently read the book, "Conversations with God," by Neale Donald Walsch. I will paraphrase by saying that at one point in the book he says that we used to beg the universe for truth, and now we tell the universe our truth. I mean no disrespect to readers who embrace a more conventional faith. That is not the path that I have chosen, however.
It's my belief that Joseph Campbell nailed it when he said that the only meaning my life has is what I bring to it. I create the kind of life I want. I choose what is meaningful. I bring purpose to my life. An avid reader, I am by nature a thinker and I enjoy gathering different viewpoints, but when it comes down to what am I to do with my life, it's all up to me. I choose what is meaningful. I decide what my purpose is.
What makes you feel alive? What do you find meaningful? What are the things that you do on purpose? What is your truth?
Susan
The sages down through the ages have pondered the meaning of life and what its purpose might be. Some people find meaning in religion. They spend time in prayer, they read the sacred writings, they ask their god what his will would be, and they try to carry it out. Others find meaning in philanthropy, or perhaps helping their fellow men through medicine, science, music or art. There are those who chase the American dream, whose success in the business world provides jobs for other people. There are those who wander through life wondering what to do next, why they are here on this earth at this place and time, and what it is they should do. They seek meaning and purpose. They cry out for truth.
I recently read the book, "Conversations with God," by Neale Donald Walsch. I will paraphrase by saying that at one point in the book he says that we used to beg the universe for truth, and now we tell the universe our truth. I mean no disrespect to readers who embrace a more conventional faith. That is not the path that I have chosen, however.
It's my belief that Joseph Campbell nailed it when he said that the only meaning my life has is what I bring to it. I create the kind of life I want. I choose what is meaningful. I bring purpose to my life. An avid reader, I am by nature a thinker and I enjoy gathering different viewpoints, but when it comes down to what am I to do with my life, it's all up to me. I choose what is meaningful. I decide what my purpose is.
What makes you feel alive? What do you find meaningful? What are the things that you do on purpose? What is your truth?
Susan
Monday, May 16, 2011
In the Sweet By and By
"The world you desire can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours." Ayn Rand
This hymn by S. Fillmore Bennett and Joseph P. Webster describes the comfort of a sweet after life, a place where we are reunited with loved ones.
Do you know the story of Lazarus? He and his two sisters, Mary and Martha, were close friends of Jesus. He had often been a guest in their home. When he received word that Lazarus was very ill, Jesus did not rush to him immediately. He waited two days and in that time, Lazarus passed away.
Martha heard that Jesus was finally on his way to their home, and while her sister stayed inside, Martha ran down the road to meet him. The first words out of her mouth were, "If you were here, my brother would not have died." Was she angry, hurt, disappointed? I don't know, but I can guess. Then she added, "But even now, I know that God will give you whatever you want."
Jesus told her that her brother would rise again, and Martha, who was a woman of faith, replied that she knew he would, on the last day. In the sweet by and by, if you will. Jesus said, "I am the resurrection and the life." Then he walked right into the house and raised Lazarus from the dead. Literally, really and truly. Right then and there.
Could it be the life we want is already ours? Could it be that we are so focused on hoping for it to happen sometime in the future that we fail to see we already possess it?
Susan
This hymn by S. Fillmore Bennett and Joseph P. Webster describes the comfort of a sweet after life, a place where we are reunited with loved ones.
Do you know the story of Lazarus? He and his two sisters, Mary and Martha, were close friends of Jesus. He had often been a guest in their home. When he received word that Lazarus was very ill, Jesus did not rush to him immediately. He waited two days and in that time, Lazarus passed away.
Martha heard that Jesus was finally on his way to their home, and while her sister stayed inside, Martha ran down the road to meet him. The first words out of her mouth were, "If you were here, my brother would not have died." Was she angry, hurt, disappointed? I don't know, but I can guess. Then she added, "But even now, I know that God will give you whatever you want."
Jesus told her that her brother would rise again, and Martha, who was a woman of faith, replied that she knew he would, on the last day. In the sweet by and by, if you will. Jesus said, "I am the resurrection and the life." Then he walked right into the house and raised Lazarus from the dead. Literally, really and truly. Right then and there.
Could it be the life we want is already ours? Could it be that we are so focused on hoping for it to happen sometime in the future that we fail to see we already possess it?
Susan
Friday, March 18, 2011
The Pot of Gold
"It's a beautiful day. Don't let it get away." Paul Hewson, Dave Evans, Adam Clayton, Larry Mullen, Jr.
It is now the morning after St. Patrick's Day, a holiday where every American is at least a tiny bit Irish. I got an email at 4:00 yesterday afternoon from my professor, telling us that our class last night was cancelled. I wanted to shoot back a reply, "Green beer?" but I try not be too much of a smart aleck, particularly to someone who can influence my college career. I'd imagine there are some people who woke up this morning feeling like they had been mugged by a leprechaun.
Last night I heard a U2 cover band, which was very appropriate for St. Pat's. I had not heard the song, "Beautiful Day" for some time. It is a reminder and a warning. It's a beautiful day and we shouldn't let it get away.
I know the Irish have a reputation for being melancholy people, but they certainly do know how to party. This day, today, that we have is a beautiful day if we will but look around. I know life can at times be a serious business, filled with problems and responsibilities, but what a shame it would be if we let this day slip away without acknowledging it as the amazing gift it truly is.
Susan
It is now the morning after St. Patrick's Day, a holiday where every American is at least a tiny bit Irish. I got an email at 4:00 yesterday afternoon from my professor, telling us that our class last night was cancelled. I wanted to shoot back a reply, "Green beer?" but I try not be too much of a smart aleck, particularly to someone who can influence my college career. I'd imagine there are some people who woke up this morning feeling like they had been mugged by a leprechaun.
Last night I heard a U2 cover band, which was very appropriate for St. Pat's. I had not heard the song, "Beautiful Day" for some time. It is a reminder and a warning. It's a beautiful day and we shouldn't let it get away.
I know the Irish have a reputation for being melancholy people, but they certainly do know how to party. This day, today, that we have is a beautiful day if we will but look around. I know life can at times be a serious business, filled with problems and responsibilities, but what a shame it would be if we let this day slip away without acknowledging it as the amazing gift it truly is.
Susan
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