I was born in Pennsylvania, and lived there for the first twenty-four years of my life. This morning I am very proud to tell you that is where I am from. Earlier this week, William Lynn, a Roman Catholic bishop from Philadelphia, was convicted of child endangerment. He was in a position of oversight of priests in his diocese, and he took the pedophile priests and moved them from one parish to another and another and another, never mentioning that the new priest liked to rape children. For the first time ever, a church official has been convicted of a crime for the way he handled sexual abuse claims. This ground breaking case sends a strong message, that those who are shepherds (that's what "bishop" means) had better start doing the right thing, or they will be held accountable.
And then there is the conviction of child rapist Jerry Sandusky, on 45 of the 48 counts he had against him. Pennsylvania Attorney General Linda Kelly said, "A recurring theme in this case has been, 'Who is going to believe a kid?' and the answer is, we here in Bellefonte, Pennsylvania, would believe a kid."
One in every three girls is sexually abused. One in every six boys is sexually abused. So much wrong. But right now I'm not thinking of the wrong. I am thinking of all that is right in the world. It's late, after midnight, and I am going to go to bed now. I'll lay my head on my pillow, close my eyes and remember those people on Lynn's and Sandusky's juries, those folks who got it right.
I hope they sleep well. Good night.
Susan
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexual abuse. Show all posts
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Friday, June 22, 2012
Give Them Back Their Souls
The jury is sequestered as they deliberate the fate of Jerry Sandusky, the former Notre Dame coach who is accused of raping young boys. I wrote about him here. Because they are cut off from the world, they don't know that Matthew Sandusky yesterday publicly accused his father of molesting him as well. Last fall, Matthew Sandusky's ex-wife obtained a restraining order keeping their children away from their grandfather.
While the evidence against Sandusky seems overwhelming, what it comes down to at least from my point of view, is whether or not the jury believes the testimony of the alleged victims. As I write this, the jury is still out. In closing arguments, prosecuting attorney Joseph McGettigan asked those twelve people to do right by the victims by finding Sandusky guilty and "give them back their souls."
I don't know if Sandusky committed the crimes. I have never suffered sexual abuse. I have never been raped. So I can only imagine how those who have might feel. It seems to me that McGettigan used the perfect words. Give them back their souls.
Susan
While the evidence against Sandusky seems overwhelming, what it comes down to at least from my point of view, is whether or not the jury believes the testimony of the alleged victims. As I write this, the jury is still out. In closing arguments, prosecuting attorney Joseph McGettigan asked those twelve people to do right by the victims by finding Sandusky guilty and "give them back their souls."
I don't know if Sandusky committed the crimes. I have never suffered sexual abuse. I have never been raped. So I can only imagine how those who have might feel. It seems to me that McGettigan used the perfect words. Give them back their souls.
Susan
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Arguing for Your Limitations
"You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame." Erica Jong
Do you know anyone who relishes the role of victim? They become very comfortable in their victimhood and are often experts at telling all the reasons why they can't do this and they can't do that. Their childhood, their age, their experience, their lack of experience, the weather, the economy, their spouse, their health, their ex, their own children, their education, their lack of education...the excuses abound. They are like expert trial lawyers, arguing passionately for their limitations. You might observe that they actually have a lot going for them, but don't be surprised if they become defensive when you point that out.
I am not questioning whether or not they have been victimized. That is beside the point. I know a woman in her late 20's who was sexually abused by not one, but four different friends of her family. The abuse began when she was a little girl of six. When she tried to tell her mother about it, she couldn't hear it and it is only in the past few years that her mother has started to believe her. It was not her fault. She did not bring it on herself. She was a victim in the truest sense of the world. But this courageous young woman got the therapy she needed, did the hard work involved, and she is doing great things with her life. She has chosen to interpret her experiences in a way that is very positive for herself. She was victimized, but she did not remain a victim. That is the part she could control.
Most of the issues we face are not as clear as my friend's sexual abuse. Most of our problems are caused at least in some small part by our own actions. Once I take my life in my own hands, I take ownership of every problem I have. I take responsibility for every thought, attitude, word and action. I see that I helped create the problem. Then I realize something beautiful. I also have the power to solve it.
Susan
Do you know anyone who relishes the role of victim? They become very comfortable in their victimhood and are often experts at telling all the reasons why they can't do this and they can't do that. Their childhood, their age, their experience, their lack of experience, the weather, the economy, their spouse, their health, their ex, their own children, their education, their lack of education...the excuses abound. They are like expert trial lawyers, arguing passionately for their limitations. You might observe that they actually have a lot going for them, but don't be surprised if they become defensive when you point that out.
I am not questioning whether or not they have been victimized. That is beside the point. I know a woman in her late 20's who was sexually abused by not one, but four different friends of her family. The abuse began when she was a little girl of six. When she tried to tell her mother about it, she couldn't hear it and it is only in the past few years that her mother has started to believe her. It was not her fault. She did not bring it on herself. She was a victim in the truest sense of the world. But this courageous young woman got the therapy she needed, did the hard work involved, and she is doing great things with her life. She has chosen to interpret her experiences in a way that is very positive for herself. She was victimized, but she did not remain a victim. That is the part she could control.
Most of the issues we face are not as clear as my friend's sexual abuse. Most of our problems are caused at least in some small part by our own actions. Once I take my life in my own hands, I take ownership of every problem I have. I take responsibility for every thought, attitude, word and action. I see that I helped create the problem. Then I realize something beautiful. I also have the power to solve it.
Susan
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